Mistakes and Learning Experiences

It's coming up on six months that I started this blog and now I look at the mistakes I made in starting and developing this blog.

But wait! Did I make mistakes? I guess that depends on what perspective I take in looking at the last six months.

(If you're thinking "Is this just a post about Dean's learning experiences with blogging or is there a moral to this story?" Go ahead and keep reading, you'll find out soon enough.)

In January 2007 did I know anything about blogs and blogging. Not really. I thought they were only for sharing information with family, friends and the MySpace crowd. Not a good image. Then I did some research. Learned how extensive blogging has evolved beyond the family, friends and MySpace crowd. I learned about linking, search engine optimization, comments, pingbacks, bloglogs, etc.

OK, so now I've learned some information and with this information, I'm going to plunge in and get started.

Ready * Fire * Aim

But wait, how do I get started? Blogger, Wordpress, TypePad? Use a free service or get my own domain and get a hosting service? At the time, this was a new process for me. I knew some information, definitely knew I didn't know everything and I was willing to learn as I went along and make corrections later. (I think this is a key point in perspective about mistakes and learning experiences.)

Ready * Fire * Aim

Almost six months later, I find that there is more to blogging than I initially thought. I enjoy blogging more than I find challenges to blogging. I'm thinking "OK, this is looking like something I want to continue doing." I've had a itch to write for years and never took pen to paper (see how long I've been itching to write). Business and love letters aside, I have spent very little time writing since my college days. Except for my Rocky Horror Communication Analysis paper, college papers were for the most part, very dry.

(Here is one hint to happiness, do something you like doing. I know everyone says DO what you LOVE doing, but I like writing. I love helping people, I love sharing information with people. Blogging is one way of sharing and helping people.)

Over the past couple of months, I've watch my readership climb, but have I reached people? (I hope so.) Have I made a connection? (again, I hope so.) Do I have all the tools available to optimize my writing, my readership, my reach and more? I've come to realize no. Time to make corrections and changes. Coming soon to a browser near you, a different look and feel. The learning experiences brought up by six months of blogging. (Comments and suggestions are welcome.)

Ready * Fire * Aim

Ok, now, Do I have my life on the line? No. Do I have lots of money on the line? No. Will my whole world collapse around me if I go Wordpress OR TypePad? No.

Does the severity of the questions we ask, affect how we look at mistakes verses learning experiences? Most likely, but will taking one approach "learning experiences" produce better outcomes than "mistakes"? I hope so.

Here is a personal example:

I recently, 2006, nearly lost everything. Here comes the emotional downward spiral: two "less than successful" businesses; I ended up moving in with my ex-father-in-law and was staying in the bedroom that my ex-wife grew-up in (Weird huh); unemployment for 3/4 of the year and only a part-time job the last 2 months of the year. At the time, were there mistakes made. Yes, mostly believing in mistakes as something bad. Intellectually, I knew about learning experiences, but emotionally I was wrapped up in the mistakes. And emotions are the fuel for attracting into our life. As I was focusing my attention on lack and failure, 2006 got worse and worse. It was unpleasant and I could see myself spiraling but was blinded to the answer.

December 2006, I'm introduced to The Secret. Nothing really new here, but it just shined a light in a dark cavern and got me to THINK again. DUH! The emotional charge of failure and making mistakes clouded my thinking.

2007 rolls around and things start changing. New job, new career, new opportunities. Get a new place to live and then the my children's mother tries to take custody of them from me. Hmmm. What's in your vibrational escrow. But that is a whole other topic.

It's now the end of August. I've been viewing that whole year as a learning experience. I'm able to look back at the businesses that were less than successful in 2006 as learning experiences. I've taken the emotional charge out of the mistakes (thanks to EFT and writing) and now using that time as information to make new choices going forward.

Moral of the story:

Mistakes are what we beat ourselves up with mentally and emotionally. I know, I've been there. By changing how we view life events as learning experiences, we can take in new information and process this information to a more positive outcome of the event and with an open mind, we can see more clearly.

WOW, I feel very blessed.

The recent edition of the Law of Attraction Carnival has been posted and my article The Most Important Part of Law of Attraction (IMHO) has been included as one of the featured articles.

With my busy schedule; several projects in the works; kids to love and help them to develop and grow; volunteering of my time to their schools; I am glad that I've decided to write and I'm finding it a great joy. I'm very grateful to be included in this carnival.

I would now like to direct you to Law of Attraction Carnival #25: 1 Year of Attraction In Action at Evolving Times to read other great posts about how the Law of Attraction has impacted other's lives.

Enjoy.

Personal Development List

Priscilla at PriscillaPalmer.com started compiling a list of Personal Development sites with contributions to the list from readers and other bloggers.

This is an incredible list of sites from various disciplines and practices. To quote Priscilla:

Personal development is a large topic that includes but is not limited to (law of attraction, goals, time management, physical fitness, education, motivation, inspiration, and social skills). This list should include any blog you feel can benefit us in our growth process.

I thought I had plenty to read as it is and to take advantage of the recommendations from others, I'd need a couple of uninterrupted days to read just half this list.

There are already many authors and blogs on this list I enjoy reading. Here are some that I would like to add myself because I enjoy their thoughts and style.

Drew Rozell at www.drewrozell.com

Emmanuel Lopez at The Adventures of Motivatorman!

Clyde at Feeling Good

The Most Important Part of the Law Of Attraction (IMHO)

Appreciation and Gratitude

I became exposed to the Law of Attraction in December 2006 through the movie The Secret. But what really struck a cord with me and has made the most difference in my life since seeing The Secret is Appreciation and Gratitude.

Since applying appreciation to my daily life, wonderful things have started to come into my life. Other than the goodies that have come into my life (two massages, breakfast, lunch, movie tickets, gift cards to several places) I see the world with a whole new approach and with new eyes. I see things with more perspective when appreciating what I have and when I get something I am very thankful.

Why do I say the most important part of Law of Attraction is Appreciation and Gratitude? Because, appreciating what I have sets my mind in the presence of now and is a high vibration. When in the emotion of appreciation, my senses open up, I feel lighter and more connected to source. When I appreciate, when I ame truly thankful, I feel filled with grace.

Think about this for a moment. Do you enjoy doing something for someone who is grateful for your work/actions/deeds? Would you keep doing something for those who are ungrateful or do not appreciate what you do? (psychological issues aside) For me, I tend to continue putting energy into relationships where I feel appreciated. Where gratitude is shown for my efforts, deeds, gifts, etc. I desire to continue doing for others. When I am unappreciated, I will seek out a way to find gratitude to be given to me from another source.

Fortunately, the universe passes no judgements on us for lack of appreciation of what we receive. But appreciating what we have and thankful for what we get raises our vibrations. (Abraham places Appreciation in the number 1 slot in the Emotional Guidance Scale.) That is what the universe reacts to, our vibrations. So it makes sense to keep putting out the higher vibrations so the universe responds to those vibrations more than others.

For some, showing gratitude or being thankful for what we receive gets in the way of their current experience. They are on the lower end of the Emotional Guidance Scale and vibrating at lower levels. Fortunately, gratitude is a habit that can be learned and developed.

When I was young, my parents taught me social skills. I was taught to say "thank you." "Thank you" became a habit that frequently carried no real feeling of gratitude. Sure, every once in awhile I received a gift that WOW'd me, someone did a special thing that really brought up the emotion of appreciation. But for much of our lives we say "thanks" out of societal expectation of courtesy.

So, some might ask "What do I have to be thankful for?" Consider this example by contrast.

If you are reading this, then you have a computer or at least Internet access at school or public library; therefore you live in a country that is full of abundance. By contrast there are people in this world that do not have Internet access, nor a computer, nor a local library, heck, not even enough food to feed themselves. And you think about how much you don't have. In contrast you live in abundance. Think about this for a minute. Really, think about this for a minute. Look at the society you live in compared to some who do not have enough good food or clean water.

Click here and go to The Hunger Site. Click on the "Click Here to Give - it's FREE!" button.

You might be looking at your current situation and comparing to some other lifestyle you want to experience. It's good to remember to briefly observe other lifestyles for comparisons to keep some perspective. Now you have something to be thankful for, living in an advanced society.

"OK Dean, I live in an advanced society, and surrounded by abundance, but I could never manifest anything I want."

On the contrary. We manifest EVERY day. You wake, you are hungry and desire to eat something. You seek a way to satisfy your desire by finding food either in the kitchen, the grocery store, a restaurant, mom and dad's house, etc. You have a job that brings in money so you can exchange for food, shelter and clothing. Why do we poo poo this manifestation of our desires (to eat every day) because it is such a common and repetitive manifestation that we do not appreciate that food is so plentiful in most modern societies. We all work, earn money, each day because we desire to eat several times a day. What if you didn't work? Would you be thankful for when you do get a job that allows you to buy food once again. Are you thankful when a friend/family member/stranger feeds you? So be thankful each and every meal. Be thankful each time you get in your car, so you can go to work, go buy groceries, go to a restaurant. Be thankful for your education, whatever level you attained. Be thankful for (fill in the blank).

There are many exercises that help us build our skills and this is one that really I like. It uses something we might not fully utilize ever day, but we do use every day. Our senses. This exercise is high in value, raises vibrations, increases our awareness, and develops our appreciation.

When I walk out my front door and am more fully in the presence of nature, that is, unobstructed by the man made construction of a house/condo/apartment, etc. I allow myself to sense more of the beauty of the world. I take a moment and breath deeply of the morning air. Try it every day, take just a couple of deep breaths and smell the day. Notice the smells, exhaust of cars, fresh cut grass, woodsy smells from trees, scent of flowers, the smell of oil rising from the asphalt after a night of rain. Just sense these smells. Think, or say, "thank you for my sense of smell."

Open your eyes and look around w/ purpose to see the trees and their leaves, plants, grass, the sun's light on everything, the shadows created. Look at the various shades of greens and browns, cloud formations or the cloudless sky. Look at the cracks in the sidewalks, the colors of houses, the variety of car styles. Just appreciate your sense of sight. Get excited that you can see all the beauty. Think, or say, "thank you for my sense of sight."

Stop and listen to the environment. The birds chirping, hooting, cawing. Notice the car engines running smoothly or roughly, people washing the breakfast dishes, kids laughing on the way to school. Or, notice the silence and quiet of the morning. Think, or say, "thank you for my sense of hearing."

Really take this time to feel the temperature, the wind, the humidity. Use your senses. (OK, you can keep you tongue in your mouth, unless it's snowing.) Say a silent thank you for the beauty of the day you sense before you.

Now do all this again, about noon time. Notice the change in smells, sights, sounds, feel the difference of noon.

Do this once again at night.

Do this for one minute in the morning, noon and at night. That's three minutes a day. Out of 1440 minutes a day, you can spare three minutes for this exercise. Of course you can extend this longer which is more enjoyable.

So what does this have to do with appreciation? Simple.

It's very simple.

Appreciate the simple things in life. "Stop and smell the flowers." Literally.

"Step away from the ATM machine sir"

Have you ever received a check in the mail? You know it's a check because you can see through the window "Pay to the Order of:" You are so excited that you got money, good things are flowing to you. You open the envelope and your excitment crashes because you expected more but got less.

I want to share a post with you from Ed Mills at Evolving Times.

Ed Mills has a great writing style that is poignant and humorous. I hope you enjoy Catch it, Zap it, and Turn it Around as much as I did.

"I've Lost That Funky Feeling"

I recently wrote that I have been doing some energy work and was feeling a bit on the ill side. Being ill is a physical manifestation of some negative energy that is being carried around or that we hold within our emotional or mental bodies. If we hold on to this negative energy long enough and the illness manifests into a disease. At the risk of stealing someone else's idea, hyphenate the word disease, dis-ease, and you have no life of ease. Notice how you feel uncomfortable when ill? How good you feel when healthy?

Anyway, on with my story.

I've been using Thought Field Therapy (TFT) and Emotional Freedom Therapy (EFT) to clear out blockages and negative energy. (No, I'm not going to discuss why I've been doing both here.) I've been routinely listening to audio programs and reading. By that I mean more an action of habit without really getting into the audio or the reading. Yes, I intended to read/listen with the intent to get out of the funk, but I kept holding on to the funk. I felt alright, just funky.

Interesting, it didn't crack until Friday when I went for one of my morning walks. This walk was good. It was a walk focusing on eliminating this funk, to become clear and high vibing again. It was a walk with a purpose.

The walk itself was pleasant. I live in an area of San Diego called Scripps Ranch. "County Living" is the motto on some signs about the area. There is a lake, maybe a pond depending on the legal descriptions of a lake and a pond, about 400 hundred feet from home. Some homes are overlooking this lake. An abundance of eucalyptus trees surround the lake and there are some fish, frogs, birds, etc. in the micro-habitat. Overall, I quiet and pleasant environment.

While almost home, I saw in the distance a woman with a good sized dog. I think it was some type of retriever. Well, this dog seemed to be bigger than her. If the dog was standing on it's hind legs, it certainly would have towered over her. She stood about 5'2". It appeared to have more weight and mass than her, I'm guessing she weighed about 120 pounds and the dog about 180. (I'm comparing the size and weight of this dog to the St. Bernard I had many years ago.)

Now, I'm feeling a bit more positive and upbeat after this walk. Good for me. Seeing her 'working' at holding her dog back, I thought I'd make a cute little remark "Who's taking who for a walk." Nothing unusual about this. It's the same remark many people made to me while I was walking George, my Saint. It's also the same remark I've made to others who were walking big dogs and always got a cute reply back like "I'm supposed to be the one walking the dog" or "he's taking me out for the walk today" or something generally considered a pleasant exchange between neighbors walking past each other.

Boy, was I in for a shock when she said with a scowl "I'm taking the dog for a walk thank you!" I was taken aback by such a comment that she definitely took the wrong way. I turned after her to apologize for being misunderstood and her reply was "I don't need any more of your rude comments, just let me walk without being bothered by you."

WOW! My first thought was she must know my ex-wife. Then I got introspective and went over the conversation trying to figure out what I did wrong. A few feet later, one guy in a painting crew getting ready to start work, looked at me and we nodded heads and he said "How you doing?" I responded "Great, thanks." I thought, 'until I met her' but decided that I needed to drop the negative feelings that welled up inside for such an odd exchange of what should have been a pleasant passing of neighbors.

Walking the last 100 feet home, still feeling hurt for an attempt to be pleasant turning sour. I started to examine "What am I doing, feeling, thinking, that is putting off this energy that attracted this type of person to twist a quick exchange into an offensive and rude comment?" I thought, I've been dragging this negative energy around, "I've really got to drop this now." Then my thoughts shifted to her.

Being a sensitive person, I tried to understand her. I wanted to know how she might be hurting that tainted her vision of our exchange. After a moment, I realized that it didn't matter. I'm here and I've got to move on. I said I was sorry that she is in pain and went home, fed the birds, took a shower and went back out into the world. This time leaving home, I felt clearer, happier and higher vibed than I have in a couple of weeks.

In retrospect, it's interesting that I had been working on clearing out this funky feeling for sometime. It wasn't until this 'slap in the face' from a total stranger that I realized "I've really got to drop this now" really meant that 'I've got to drop this now.'

On a side note. I came across this from Tony Robbins, that if you want the answer to something, learn to ask the right questions. Now, at some point in the previous day or two, I remember sitting in the throne room wondering "how can I clear out this funky feeling? What do I need to do or say to get rid of this negative energy I'm carrying around?" Was I inspired to take this walk at that particular time to meet her for this experience, just because I asked these questions.

Funny, I don't always write my every thought, every word I say, everything I observe in my life, but it does always find a way to manifest. Let's try this "Do you see over there? That is my orchard of lemon, peach, pear, orange and apple trees. Over there is my herb and vegetable garden." Cool huh!

Law of Attraction at work again.

Well, well, well, look at what I attracted into my life.

Within the past week, I was thinking I'd like to see more videos of speakers talking about personal development, spirituality, Law of Attraction, etc. Today, while visiting Priscilla Palmer's blog her post for today directed readers to Steven Aitchison's site. Steven compliled a list of 22 video presentations that are available on the internet for free.

I've got to thank the universe for introducing me to the list of links I followed to get me to this site. Thank you Steven for putting this list together and introducing me to Stumbleupon.com.

I hope you all enjoy these videos as much as I anticipate I will enjoy them.

Help! I've Fallen and I Can Get Up.

It's been over two weeks since my last post for a few reasons. Not that it really matters, but sharing my experiences is what this blog is all about.

Recently, I put out that I'm looking for additional sources of passive income. About three weeks ago while I was reading blogs, I came across an article that reminded me of an opportunity I was looking at a few years ago. I started doing research in that project again, reading blogs, forums, ordering catalogues from manufacturers, developing a business plan, etc.

Later, I came across another source that rekindled an interest in another opportunity as well. This opportunity came up in conversations as well, so I started to put energy into researching that path as well.

Now, I've got two new projects I'm researching, I still desire to develop this blog, writing, Law of Attraction discussion groups and my speaking and coaching business. Yes, I like multi-tasking activities for variety.

While researching the business opportunities presented to me and the time I devoted into researching those projects, I took time away from blogging, meditating and other activities. Then, I started to feel a bit guilty for not being involved in those activites and picked up watching TV again as an escape. I did focused on sitcoms since laughter is a high vibration activity. Unless, it is countered with guilt for passively watching humourous disfunctional relationships on TV thereby deliberately recreating the same life that is behind me.

Now get this, in the past two weeks, I had to fight off some illness, missed sometime working and taken more medicine than I've taken in years. Of course, this could also be related to the increased energy work I'm doing in clearing out blockages and releasing negative energy. ;-)

I'm sure it's all related and each activity in itself is ok in moderation, but adding them all up is a disruption to the positive high vibration life I've been cultivating.

Then I remembered, that's a key phase here, what Aaron at Today is that Day posted an article on Summer Solstice. The key phrase in that article is "I Remember".

To quote Aaron:

...I am utterly and completely in charge of how I feel, and the fact that I how I feel from moment to moment creates my life.

So, if I feel dull, listless, unmotivated, and just generally uninterested in life, then I will have a dull, listless, unmotivated and generally uninteresting life.

On the other hand, if I realize that every single moment is a chance for me to sit up straight, consciously realize my state of mind, and make any adjustments necessary, then I end up with a life full of consciously created moments.

You can see this full article here. Aaron's got a great site, so spend sometime there.

So, today, after spending sometime reading wonderful, uplifting and all around good feeling material that can be found in my "Blogs I enjoy visiting" list I reminded myself that "I was productive, I did attract what I asked for (ways to make passive income). I observed how I felt after spending less time doing high vibrational activites blogging, meditating, writing in my journals, etc. that I remembered that being in high vibrational activities is more important than doing the research for developing additional streams of income and watching humorous disfunctional relationships. The income will still be there, the opportunities will flesh out and develop. What is most important is to keep the high vibrations happening so that I attract the people, information and resources for opportunities to come into my life.